A friend called tonight and she has a lot on her plate with her friends and family suffering with  illnesses  that may or may not be resolved.  As I was listening , I was thinking how we handle this thing called Life. Our brains register what is happening around us - on joyful  moments , our hearts sing , in other moments only our brain reacts. I knew the reality of Wayne living for several more years was not going to happen. I knew how his condition had deteriorated and I saw him become tired and lose a lot of weight in  a short time. The day he died , my heart screamed as if it had no idea I could actually lose him. The heart does not always know what the mind knows, it can't know because if it did, none of us would be able to live- we would be in a constant fearful, paralyzed state and we would be no good to anyone, especially ourselves. I hear people say "If only we had known"... I can tell you that will never happen , God gave us an ability to handle life in the only way we can . We can't feel badly about what we think we should have done or said or known. We all do the best we can with any situation at any given time and that is how we handle this thing called Life.